I told my boss that I feel like a loser. It, like most things, probably doesn’t matter. Both that I feel like a loser and I, for some reason, told my boss. Neither of these things matter. I show up to work on time every day and I get things done. I will continue to do this and feel like a loser and nothing will change except I will get older and more rigid. I turn thirty this year and I can already feel it taking hold. The resignation. Yes, this is in fact it. Life is not a movie. Gimme some righteous violence. I think most men crave this and when they don’t get it they go insane. Most men are insane and lying about it all the time. Most men are lying all the time. That’s what most jobs are. Just lying. Lying all the time and convincing yourself that’s not what you’re doing but you aren’t insane because everyone else is playing the lying game too and you all get along nicely on your playdates. Every day a playdate between grown up men who are children. Lying all the time.